Nebraska Synod ELCA

by Gretchen Ahrens, Director of Youth and Justice Ministries

I recently read a comment from someone that they struggled with the phrase “All are welcome.”  It’s one thing to say it and it’s another thing to truly live it out. Can we really, truly welcome ALL?  How do we wrestle with the ideal statement “all are welcome” and the realities of old buildings that aren’t fully accessible, traditional hymns and liturgy that some love but that leave others out or changes that seem like a good idea but are way outside the annual budget.

It’s A LOT! It can feel like an insurmountable challenge. So, (bear with me here), first I encourage you to stop using the phrase “all are welcome.” I know, it sounds crazy, but consider language like, “a church of welcoming hospitality” or, “a community centered church.”  What’s the difference? Hospitality says “I see you! I’m glad you are here, and I’d like to make you feel at home.” Community says “We want you to be a part of us. We want to get to know you and to learn about you and to find out how we can live, work, worship and grow together.”  We aren’t perfect, we don’t have all the answers, but we are willing to walk with you on a journey of accompaniment to figure it out together.

I call it “questioning hospitality” because it starts with questions. Become an observant church. What will help visitors, new members, or those that already worship there feel like they are at home. Don’t be afraid to ask, “what would make you feel more comfortable?” or “how can I help you fit in here?” Don’t assume that you know all the answers or that what works for you works for everyone. Look at your church with new eyes. Think about it like inviting someone over to your house for dinner. You want them to feel comfortable. Ask children to help you figure it out. Children get hospitality.

Each church is different, and no church can be all things to all people, but don’t be overwhelmed. Start with the small things that aren’t really that small at all. A church I attended had really heavy front doors. But no one had to worry about getting in the door because each week, Mr. Bob was right there at the front doors opening them for everyone. No one was left out or singled out because Mr. Bob opened the doors for everyone. He was there early and stayed late. Did the church have the budget for new doors or for electric buttons to make them easy to open? No. But they had Mr. Bob! And if he couldn’t be there for this important ministry, he made sure someone could.

I love to sing, I read music well and I’ve been singing the common settings of liturgy since I was young. So, sometimes I forget that it’s not common or easy for everyone. If I put my hospitality eyes on in the area of music, maybe it means sharing recorded songs ahead of time online so people can learn them and practice them? Or having practice song and liturgy sessions before or after worship? Maybe one or two hymns each week are the same all month? Maybe we learn sign language to a hymn or one of our members teaches us to sing a hymn in the language they are most comfortable speaking. I recently attended a church where the communion hymn was “Jesus Loves Me” and it was intentionally sung very slowly and repeated several times so that all could follow and sing along.

There is no limit to practicing hospitality or building community. Ask the questions, think creatively, and remember we are all God’s children!